My normal post was going to be a follow up to my previous post on Family – Teams, but the situation we find ourselves facing with Covid-19 begs at least one post. To tee this up, my kids schools shut down, and are working to get online classes up and running. I have been asked to telework from home, and my husband due to his work is working specific shifts minimizing human interaction, though not teleworking yet, is probably inevitable. Four of us are in the house together operating separately and together. This makes for an interesting situation – mentally I have flashbacks to the “Family Circus” cartoon series. As a family, we are practicing social distancing, so the opportunity for us to get away from each other is small and opportunity to really get under each other’s skin is really high. I wanted to share how we are choosing to deal with it.

First and foremost, we are taking advantage of the time together. When I am not working, I am present in whatever activity my children choose to do.

Second, we are in uncharted waters, we are not going to get this right straight out of the gate, but if we work together as #TeamJackson, we will. (#TeamJackson and #Jax5, and #Jackson5 are frequent tags I use to talk about our family, but will only use the first two here due to Copyright privileges.)

Yes, #TeamJackson has had these conversations, we all need to have reasonable expectations.

Out of the gate, I became that Mom! I put together a schedule of what a day out of school might look like; complete with quiet time, creative time, academic time, exercise time, chore time and free time, etc. Then I handed each child a blank schedule and together they came up with a schedule that they wanted to use. We agreed on the amount of time that needed to be spent in each area. Giving the kids the freedom to develop their own schedule means they own it! Understand, we are operating on the idea that we have to have a plan to deviate from. We are on day 3 of our journey, and we have not stuck to the schedule – not once, but we have accomplished all the elements. Does it matter? Nope, it doesn’t. We have to be fluid. I will tell you, the one point that I won’t allow is to have free time come first. Free time is earned. Other than that, the schedule is fluid as long as we accomplish the elements.

On day 2 our school system announced classes coming online, so we have to be flexible, what we (the Jax5 Team) did agree on is that schoolwork comes first. Until we know how and when their teachers are going to post their assignments, we have to be open to change and be fluid. So our plan? Once we accomplish our wake up routine, morning exercise and breakfast, we hit our school work. They will check their accounts and complete any work assigned from the previous day. Once that is done they are free to enjoy quiet time or creative time (no device time) because the rest of us could still be working. We need to respect everyone’s environment. We will have lunch together. If we need to continue school work we will, if not we check the school accounts one more time to make sure that any questions asked have been answered and any work left can be completed. Once all schoolwork is done the rest of the elements can be accomplished, including free time.

I don’t want you to perceive that the kiddos are sitting at a table working studiously on end. They have ADHD – all 3 of them. You have got to be Kidding Me! The kids are up and down, moving from room to room, with a device, or worksheet, or book. Sometimes they are sitting on an exercise ball, or out on the porch. My goal as a mom at this moment in time is to ensure the work gets done – that’s it. If my son works better upside down on the couch with his feet in the air – does it matter? I have been known to take my book and go over and mimic him and just read next to him but not disturb the process. If we need to swap quiet time and creative time because that fits better today – does it matter? If we need to take a break and try and drink a cup of water while holding it with our knees, then that is what we do. (I highly recommend this activity – you will laugh and giggle but it will require lots of towels and probably a change of clothes). The important part is then we are done, and we get back at it. We keep trying.

We have over the past few years established a list of reference, additive and supplemental websites for the kids to use to add to what they learn. The list came about because Special K (my husband) and I are not expert teachers in all of the subjects my kids take. We have the internet and we can search. We have found sites that explain the subjects the kiddos are taking far better than we ever could. As we have gained confidence in the different sites, we transferred the responsibility of looking up questions to the kids. Instead of us looking up the answers, or giving the answers (the few that we know) we have set the expectation for our kids to look up their questions on the specific sites first. If they have given it a good effort to look up the questions but can’t find the answers, then we dive in and enlist the help of the internet. We feel that this teaches the kids that it is okay not to know all the answers, and when they don’t know the answers, they are equipped with the tools to figure it out. Including the ability to ask for help. With the current home school situation, this expectation doesn’t change. I will admit I am learning a lot!

Working together tip: We have also instituted Flags! I need to telework and need to be able to participate in teleconferences, but much of my work is via a laptop. Enter Flags. Yes, Flags. So we have flags from being soccer referees an such since our seasons have been cancelled, we are still putting them to use. The set includes, a red one and a yellow one. (note, you can make your own with construction paper or pillow cases, or t shirts…) Keep in mind, my kids are visual learners, so this works very well with them. When I am teleconferencing the red flag goes up – it sticks out of the paper towel holder in the center of our table where I am working. This means I am in “time-out” and quite is required. When I am not on a teleconference, the yellow flag is up, while still working, I am accessible. We are on day 3 and it has worked well – stay tuned for more on this experiment

One of my favorite lines at the end of the day when leaving work is “we will try again tomorrow – so till next post – try again tomorrow.